138. Why Women Struggle to Communicate Their Needs Clearly and Directly
Why do so many women find it challenging to clearly articulate their needs? This episode of the Language Alchemy Podcast, hosted by Alejandra Siroka, tackles this question head-on, right in time for International Women's Day.
Alejandra discusses the dual purpose of International Women's Day: to celebrate women's achievements and advance gender equality. She stresses the need for women to express their needs as a critical aspect of achieving equality and recognition in society.
The episode examines common reasons why women struggle with communication, drawing on Alejandra's experiences and insights from working with women. She identifies societal conditioning, childhood influences, and cultural expectations as key factors that lead to indirect and often unclear expression of needs.
Alejandra offers advice for overcoming these communication barriers, focusing on self-reflection, the importance of community support, and the process of unlearning problematic communication patterns.
Quotes:
• "When all the women in your life are able to communicate their needs with clarity, confidence, and compassion, they will be able to thrive because they will know in their bones that they matter as much as the male members of our human family. And women cannot thrive if they think they're less than men, or if they believe that they have not earned the right to have needs." (01:37 | Alejandra Siroka)
• "Why is it so challenging for women to simply say, I would like to receive more support from you when the kids are sick? Or, my body is telling me I need to rest and I can't keep volunteering every weekend. You need to find another volunteer. Or, I'm struggling to keep up with all the tasks and deadlines you're giving me. I need one more person in my team if you'd like us to meet the goals for this quarter. Why is it that women can't simply express their needs easily with their partners, with their adult children, with their coworkers, with our parents and other family members, with people in our community, with strangers? Why? Have you ever asked yourself that question?" (5:00 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “So they say to me, Alejandra, how come my partner doesn't see I need more help with our kids' homework? How come my parents don't see I need more time with my friends and I can't spend every vacation with them? When I ask these women if they've communicated these needs to the other person, just like they're doing it with me, the answer I sometimes get is, um, maybe, or sometimes it's no, or I shouldn't need to. They should already know. I know so many people who think that way. My mother included. Why would we believe that the people in our lives should read our minds and know what we need without us asking them? The answer has to do with language and communication.” (08:12 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “Why would we believe that the people in our lives should read our minds and know what we need without us asking them? The answer has to do with language and communication.” (08:51 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “Learning to communicate our needs is part of our journey to become an adult woman.” (16:52 | Alejandra Siroka)
Links
To have group coaching with Alejandra, visit:
https://www.languagealchemy.com/groupcoaching
To work with Alejandra, visit: www.languagealchemy.com/workwithme
To join the Language Alchemy mailing list, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com
To ask questions you'd like Alejandra to answer in the podcast, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/podcastquestion
To find out about 1:1 transformative communication coaching with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/oneonone
To find out about couple transformative communication coaching with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/couples
To schedule a reduced-rate coaching consultation with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/newclient
To follow Alejandra on instagram follow @languagealchemy
Podcast Music composed by Gary Lapow: open.spotify.com/artist/1HlMhcNfKIELxYil5mVqD
