Habitual patterns


Can Your Feelings Get Hurt?

Can Your Feelings Get Hurt?

A friend offers feedback about your forgetting to call her for her birthday; a lover breaks up with you; a colleague tells you the email you sent has too many typos; a family member expresses their anger at you.  All these interactions can lead to you saying “Ouch, that hurts my feelings!” I’ve heard that expression so many times and became very curious about whether...

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Our Internal Dialogue: How We Got It and How We Can Use It Consciously to Cultivate Healthy Relationships

Our Internal Dialogue: How We Got It and How We Can Use It Consciously to Cultivate Healthy Relationships

When you and I were babies, we came to the world with the ability to communicate.  We cried, stared, moved our limbs, shrieked, cooed, and made all kinds of noises and movements to get attention from our parents and caretakers. We did this for two reasons. One, we could not fend for ourselves, so we needed others to pay attention to us and help us...

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The Main Obstacle to Authentic Speech

The Main Obstacle to Authentic Speech

Oscar’s Wilde quote to “be oneself because everybody else is taken” invites us to show up authentically based on our individuality. The question that has haunted me for decades has been how to do this. Really, how do we communicate in a way that reflects who we truly are? I am writing this blog to address this question. When we want to speak authentically, we...

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Quieting the Inner Interrogator

Quieting the Inner Interrogator

The beginning of the year found you contemplating new actions you want to take. You can feel a certain kind of electricity in your body when you consider the kind of experiences you can have if you take action. And in an instant, that sense of electricity gets dimmed. Your inner knowing is overpowered by a familiar inner voice I call the Inner Interrogator. Yes,...

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Unwrapping the Gift of Change in Family Dynamics

Unwrapping the Gift of Change in Family Dynamics

The holiday season and the end of the year can be a wonderful opportunity to choose to communicate consciously with family and friends.  I often hear from some of you that the holidays are challenging because you will be spending time with people with whom you have established challenging communication dynamics. In many cases, these dynamics lead us feeling disappointed, frustrated and unseen for who...

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3 Ways to Communicate Lovingly in Vulnerable Situations

3 Ways to Communicate Lovingly in Vulnerable Situations

You know you are a loving person. You get how rewarding it is to have a loving conversation with someone and to feel like you are connecting and seeing one another as loving human beings. Maybe you find it easier to feel a sense of ease and care in your communication with strangers, like the cashier at the store or someone on a bus or...

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3 Keys to Turn a Potential Argument into a Conversation

3 Keys to Turn a Potential Argument into a Conversation

You’ve been irritated by your partner’s actions for a while. You like to get to places on time and feel uneasy when you have to wait by yourself on the street because your partner is running late. Having a harmonious and loving relationship with your partner is important for you.  For the sake of that harmony, you tend to wait for a couple of days...

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The Gift of Communicating Anger Compassionately

The Gift of Communicating Anger Compassionately

Your day started with ease. You took some time for self-connection before leaving home. You did some yoga, meditation or took some conscious breaths. “Today is going to be a great day,” you say to yourself. You leave home with a sense of purpose and optimism.  As you drive to your first meeting, traffic is slow. You turn the radio on and hear some disturbing...

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Woman was planting new born in garden background

Cultivating the Courage to Take Compassionate Action

What is compassionate action? I’m defining compassionate action as the ability do something to alleviate the pain that’s being experienced by ourselves or others. We take compassionate action because of our love and care for those who are suffering. It is undeniable that at this time, there is so much pain and suffering in our communities and the world.  And while there are many specific...

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Language is More Than Words

Language is More Than Words

Today we have an unprecedented ability to connect to other human beings via the Internet and other mediums and yet many of us are feeling lonely, isolated and dissatisfied with our human relationships. According to the World Health Organization, the number of people suffering from depression and/or anxiety has increased by nearly 50% in the last 15 years, especially in areas that are heavily populated....

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